The pursuit of Happiness

One of my most look forwarded to weekend indulgences is reading Sumiko Tan's fortnightly column in LifeStyle. Its the first thing i do after waking up in the afternoons and comfortably positioning myself on the most pillow filled place on my couch. When Sumiko Tan was on leave for the last three weekends, i had serious withdrawal symptoms. Even TIME magazine was more interesting than LifeStyle then.

Anyway, last weekend, to my utmost delight, Sumiko Tan was back! I love her columns because they are a breeze to read, easy to relate to and i admire how she dares to expose her fears and weaknesses without inhibitions to a weekend crowd of close to 1.5million.

This week, she wrote about the Pursuit of Happiness

In the article, it is said that about 50% of a person's happiness depends on his genes. I read before somewhere that everyone has an innate set point of happiness, a happiness level that is in born. This level may move upwards or downwards depending on events but you can't change that equilibrium point God gave you. Point in view, your genes therefore determine whether you are going to have a happier ( or sadder) life as compared to others.

If I were to rate my own innate set point of happiness, on a scale of one to ten, i would give myself a 8.

But if i were to think about the Fendi bag that i adore, SJP's gorgeous wardrobe, my could be slimmer and taller body and my diminishing bank account balance, i would give myself a 7. hahaa.

I think, if i were to rate myself a few years ago, i would have given myself a 8.5. But, the difference now would be that I am able to appreciate happiness more than i could in the past. Maybe its such because i have lived through unhappiness and thus can compare both. So, besides genetics, does a person's happiness have to do with age, maturity and experience?

Like most people, everything i do, everything i hope for and everything i regret hinges on the pursuit of personal happiness. I dream of big things that would set me on the pinnacle of contentment but sometimes when that dream comes true, you don't always get the happiness you thought would come with it. I think it all boils down to how satisfied and contented you are as a person as well. I love to dream and idealize. i form castles in the skies, empires actually, and there are no limits in my horizons. Its all good if i was perhaps working for Oglivy but unfortunately I'm not , which is why i have to constantly remind myself to appreciate what i have and not set up barricades of expectations.

Before i end, i quote this phrase in the article " It is hard to be happy when you are stuck in the past or in the future" . From first hand experience i know how hard it is to be happy when you are stuck comparing you life with what you use to have. But the second part of this phrase which talked about being stuck in the future struck me. I never ever thought that thinking or fantasizing about a future would affect a person's happiness, but i guess, it makes perfect logical sense.

I think sometimes, you don't need big dreams to come true to make you happy. I have experienced utmost bliss in the most simple things. From a hug by a friend, a thoughtful SMS, gestures from strangers, sitting by the beach, drawing and laughing. Sometimes, when all these fail, i try to think of 2 things that will bring me back to/or raise my low point. First off, i will remind myself that what ever happens is by God's will and that for whatever that I'm going through it all happens for a reason. For He will not bring you where His grace cannot keep you. And second off, mummy once told me that sometimes in life, when you put your problems in perspective, it doesn't seem so bad after all. I mean, if i compare my problems to those we are grieving over loss of a family member, or to people in countries facing wars, i should consider myself a 9.5/10.

One reason why i like to blog is because it allows me to run through my thoughts, and when i pen them down, i feel so though I've just organized my life. And right now, my 8 has just moved up a notch.

On a different note, Its the start of something new now...(: All those years of experience have just gone down the drain because this is a totally new experience, I'm treading on foreign soil. I'm afraid of making the same mistake again, of getting hurt, or letting things get too far, of leaning too much on someone else...gosh i sound like a freaking pussy lah. I have lots of doubts and am uncertain as hell but all i can say is that I'm going to have faith and i hope i made the right decision. Who knows, maybe what i need right now is something different after all; and amidst all my doubts, I am Happy :D:D

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is thy faithfulness. - Lamentations 3:22-23